The devil came to roost
making a home in my heart
driving down a rainy side street
cheap wine taste on my tongue
grease running across the windshield
soiling the fall leaves
and when he cracks a wink
he says there's a little piece of god in everybody
a mean animal place
in every orphan's eye
worn through over time.
Tapping out a Camel
the devil says he needs a new face
one without the sad little grin
a face full of thorns
not one like mine
a weary beaten thing
a china doll mask
pliable
yet brittle.
Under a cloud of smoke
the devil says I have an ugly face
something he saves for old widows
a cackle for the corps
and he slaps his leg,
like it was funny
his breath sizzling the smaller hairs
teeth like angry diamonds
bit sharply into the filter.
Spitting it onto the floor
the devil said if only there were no god
he'd be able to retire
spend his days getting golden in Barbados
his nights fucking blue haired old ladies until dawn's first kiss
but he was stuck in the 9 to 5
the same old grind
since the beginning of time
just another working joe
stiff in the joints
nickel and dimming a lotto slide
also coming up a loser.
After the third cigarette
the devil leaned back slow
whispered from across the smoldering seat
"you're much to barren for me,
pull over to the side"
And I did.
Looking at him in my mirror
a split forming down the center
I pulled away slow
leaving him by the side of the road
water spattering his boots
each droplet an angry sigh.
But I took his words with me
each one a painful treasure
full of world weary truth
good for nothing
and worth less.

12/97

The new children
gathered under blue light glow
worshiping in the temple of hip
chittering over black lip stained coffee mugs yellow teeth gnawing another coffin nail shut it was all the same
traveling from state
to state
these nouveau simps
tight plastic shorts
faded lawn chair comforts
it was all my style
so many grey houses to haunt
one after the other
always waiting to rise
to take my turn at the microphone
to beat their pale faces with my words
rip down a piece of their veil
burn off a scrap of the blind fold
lend them a vision
an unwanted epiphany
that squeezes
so tenderly
so mercilessly
following them home
a glint of amputee twister
where every right hand is on red
all the halloween candy twinkles
pulse racing
pounding up from the grave
a little sweat in the small of my back
nestling with the lead kisses
held for evening's tide
the final one to bear my sight
the only child left
within my cold fingered reach
spitting up blood
gasps mixing with the expresso machine noise a coffee bean gurgle
milking my qualms
my regrets
impounding the guilt
in the last retina reflection
my face
my horrible faces
staring back from dead eyes.

10/7/97

Promised the Angel...

The rain's still coming down.
Cold and lifeless.
No joy.
It just keeps coming.
And I sit in it.
Dreaming of a single golden kiss.
A single, soft golden kiss to close my tired eyes, fluttering down from above to light up the sky,
to turn each raindrop into another wet gold lip sliding down my skin,
melting my soul down to be reforged.
A stronger kinder thing.
A harder thing.
Your thing.

Because I see this kiss.
Lurking in the backs of your crystal blue eyes.
I can't think.
All day long.
All night long.
Nothing else,
but the last time you touched me
and it all went away.

All of my nightmares.
All of my wounds.
All of my hurts.
All of my scars.
You took them from me.
Stripped me bare,
with a single
golden
kiss.

And for that I'm going to hunt you.
I'm going to stalk the soft part
the part untouched
the ground unwalked
the words unspoken
that you whisper to yourself in the night
and I'm going to stroke it
I'm going to lick it
caress it
until it throbs
until it loves
until it's mine
and no other.

I'm going to trick it
Seduce it
fuck it
grip your soul in my fists
bite down on it's lust
bend it's neck back
peel back the webs
and make it love me.

Like a junkie loves it's smack
Like a hungry child for it's milk
Like a jackal on the kill
a pimp's promise to the new whore

you will love me.
And I will have those golden kisses.

12/7/97

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